In any event, the retention of semen or the conscious control of
ejaculation is a personal issue, since it doesn't affect a twenty-year-old
young man in the same way as a fifty-year-old adult. The loss of energy
through ejaculation has a different meaning for each individual, so each
must decide when and how to establish his own frequency.
At the highest levels of eroticism, orgasm becomes merely a point
in time, a further incentive in the state of intense and continuous
physical and emotional splendor that lovers successfully evoke in each
other. Sex is not considered a sensation, but a feeling. The attraction
is not an appetite, but an "eye-to-eye contact." Love is not a reaction,
but a carefully fostered creation, a prolonged mental and bodily ecstasy
whose flames are kept alive by the prolonged stimulation of the
sexual organs and not by the mere reciprocal release. In this sense, the
rituals accompanying the sex acts also convey charges of accumulated
energy.
The positions and internal contractions that take place in the
course of the Tantric union are based on this conception of sexual
love. But the special condition of inner splendor that they provoke
only manifests when the erotic focus of attention shifts from the external
and sensorial personification of desire to the inner goddess of
which all external women are a manifestation. In this sense, the satisfaction
of the woman is extremely important, since only with such
satisfaction will a woman bestow all of her initiation potential on her
lover. Both the woman and man, therefore, are key to reciprocal delight.
This does not mean that one will lose value in the eyes of the
other. Quite the contrary—because each will become a divinity in
the other person's eyes.
Tantric erotic positions, known as bandhas (locks), were devised to
inwardly channel the energy flowing outward. Hands and feet are used
frequently as aids in this extremely important process: to cause sexual
energy to circulate instead of that energy being lost. An essential ingredient
in Tantric practice is to honor the inner spirit. That is how love
assumes its liberating and truly eternal character.
The sexual relationship consists then of delivering one's sexuality to
another person. When someone accepts the sexual act as a gift, exchanges
take place at various levels: a physical exchange of secretions, a
psychophysical exchange of vital polarities and energies, a karmic exchange
through the convergence of destinies, and a spiritual exchange
in the communion of spirits. All these exchanges enhance the quality of
the couple's relationship.
Tantra does not advise prolonged sexual abstinence, since it leads to
the accumulation of unnatural sexual currents inside the body. Retention
consists of maintaining pleasure as a light in the midst of a storm.
Tantric texts underscore the importance of "absorbing your partner's
equivalent" when there is a release of vital fluids. The loss of semen,
which originates from all parts of the body, weakens the man and
shortens his life. To counteract the loss caused by ejaculation, the man
must consciously absorb the woman's secretions, for which there are
various techniques.
Tantric Sexuality
Tantra seeks the expansion of the mind by freeing energy from the fetters
that bind it to the dense dimensions of matter. Tantra is the system
whereby Shakti, the primordial energy, is released. To achieve this, it is
necessary to work diligently with a proper diet, proper breathing
(pranayama), proper exercise, proper relaxation, and proper thoughts
(meditation).
At the same time, making love is an ideal opportunity for the conscious
circulation of energy, and either partner may cause his or her
own energy as well as the energy of the partner to circulate.
Energy circulates when we make love, but it is often lost due to a
lack of awareness. It is important to familiarize ourselves with the sensation
of a free flow of energy in order to recognize it consciously. It is
surprising to realize how easily the mind is able to feel the flow of energy
if we let our intuition get in contact with the body of our partner.
Deep breathing enables us to experience the energy flow. We can see
that certain parts of the body feel awakened, while others are asleep or
less stimulated.